dharma and integral worldview


Some circumstances drive us to the limits of our understanding of the world. We find out questions that have no answers, and deep inside we feel the answer requires some strange efforts and this make us feel scared. The allusions from the unknown and invisible world appear like flashes of memories from unknown past and disappear at once.

For everybody of us comes the time to learn dharma. You want it or not, but it comes. It offers you a range of difficulties, unbelievable pain and disappointment in your normal life. You might try not to notice the limits of understanding of the world, and deepen more and more in the daily routine, renounce happiness, dreams, aspirations. But the Black Hole in your chest you cannot ignore anymore.

Teacher. As soon as you are ready, you meet your teacher. He or She gives you lessons of your dharma. The new worldview. Which explains the unknown and invisible world which is, as it occurs, more real and even only real, than the world you used to call yours. Dharma is the new law you have to perceive. It’s the law of the new You, the spiritual You. It’s the strategy and the path. It’s the way to be happy.

Integral worldview – is dharma, which gives new instruments, new practice, new thinking and understanding, and reveals your Real I. It’s not an easy way, because you have to learn living from the very beginning, as if you had to be born again. Each thought, each belief has to be revised. Each relation, each argue, each offence… It requires you to turn yourself inside out.

Integral worldview as dharma – it’s a spiritual self-realization beyond religions and philosophies, although it never negates them.What’s more – it uses their practices and methods to grasp the consciousness, the Self awareness, the integrity of all levels of being – from the Absolute, spiritual thin energies to the heavy material reality, which seems to be really “real”. Dharma – is our duty to find out who we are, why we are here, and how can we live a happy life, if it’s possible. Well, yep, it’s possible. Really happy life is being really You, with all Your real goals, tasks, relations, realizations, creativity, joy, love.

You might hate the world LAW, but there are laws your soul live according to and it finds joy and happiness from fulfilling this duty. It’s a tasty, happy, joyful obligation. As soon as you find them, you won’t be able to forget the trembling in your heart – your eternal soul feels higher pleasure and it fills your body and mind. You then understand: that is it! You feel yourself at home.


who writes the constitution of my life?

I wake up in the morning with the certain attitude to the day. I open my eyes with certain expectation and feeling. I’m ready to face the circumstances and people. The scheme of my aptitudes and patterns, the hierarchy of my values, meaning of life (or its absence) are on. I do not have to revise and rearrange them all again and again each morning. They are sealed in my heart and my mind since I cannot trace when. Well, why should I. If anyone has a problem with me, it’s his/hers problem, isn’t it?

It’s seems to me, I’m right, I’m fair, loyal and always worthy of the best fortune, praise, friends, work, mate. But look around. My friends have no idea they are my friends, my relations are sick, my work is a ghost, my achievements are scanty. I do not feel comfortable anywhere, with anyone. I’m always unsatisfied and miserable. My ups and downs drive me crazy. Although each morning I wake up again and again with the same mindset. What can I do with it? It’s written down deep inside my mind, I cannot even realize what’s actually there.

It’s a kind of constitution written down for my life. It tells me who I am – looser or queen, who what when owes me in this life, my rights and duties, my beliefs and stereotypes. I have no idea who has written it (my ancestors, my parents, church or society), I do not actually know the details, but somehow it shapes my opinion each second, my attitude and my feeling of guilt.

It wouldn’t have been a problem if I didn’t hear some other traitorous voices from time to time inside my mind. They whisper: this world is not true, you are asleep…


Happiness is … in the detail

Kyrgyz woman: The strange February weather brought us many surprises. The spiders and ladybirds are awaken and make much fuss all around. They are so delicate and tiny, but reveal so much life and creativity. I can observe the same spider each morning on my floor, examining the space, while I’m trying to concentrate on my meditation (my third eye is always open!). He (or she) probably has no idea about my existence and what’s worse, about my spiritual attempts. And ladybirds like my woolen mat under the worktable.

The sun is rare guest in Carpatia, when the temperatures are high, the mists and clouds cover the mountains like a heavy blanket. The flocks of all possible varieties of birds rush from one point to another, forming amazing waves and spirals in the air. They have enough food, entertainment, the air is warm. They seem to be countless.

The winds actuates the lazy sleepy trees. Maybe they would prefer to stay a bit more hibernated, but no way. They are shaken, tossed, wrung, stroked.

The streets are totally empty. There’s still no work in the fields, no shopping malls, and no holiday. Otherwise some people would appear to go to the church. It’s an occasion to put on new nice clothes, arrange some nice hairdo and drive a car.

Only dense white smoke from the chimneys indicates the presence of others.

I’m observing the world, birds, people, mountains and trains through the window. I’ve caught a nasty cold and have totally no intention to go out. But suddenly I notice some timid sun beams. Hmm. Well, maybe I’ll go for a little walk or pop up to the shops to check the fruits and vegetables.

Living in the countryside makes one sensitive for anything artificial – smells, tastes, emotions, jokes. It teaches to find joy and happiness in perceiving and listening to the world and not imposing own rules and expectations. The latter will definitely disappoint you and the first will make you calm, far-seeing and sagacious.

From the body-oriented worldview to the integral worldview

1af2ba720e6f557a8515a4a6f4671dd8I’ve been thinking of writing this post long ago. I was a diligent researcher on Kazimierz Dabrowki’s Theory of Positive Disintegration for the needs of my thesis about the personal development in the democratic society. I’ve read almost all his books in Polish and all possible articles in English (what an amazing personality he was!) and I highly appreciate his “stairs to heaven” – his theory about 5 levels of mental development. You can observe the systematization of something that cannot be caught and measured, but yet, he managed to do that! The subtle hierarchy of emotions, states, values and meanings is developing from level to level till the last one – Secondary Integration. I took a piece of description from Wikipedia:

“The fifth level displays an integrated and harmonious character, but one vastly different from that at the first level. At this highest level, one’s behavior is guided by conscious, carefully weighed decisions based on an individualized and chosen hierarchy of personal values. Behavior conforms to this inner standard of how life ought to be lived, and thus little inner conflict arises.”

This level is probably the most interesting for me. It sounds like a goal for every human being. The level of Secondary Integration is based on the personal and social ideal. So I suppose this ideal should be built, formulated and definitively is not spontaneous. I guess the first three levels (from second to the forth) are the chance to intuitively turn from the body-oriented worldview to the integral one.

Body-oriented worldview is based on the values of survival. But the blisses of happiness, joy, thankfulness, insights, knowledge, freedom prompt us, that there’s something more, then just survival, then just fight. We suspect, there’s something more we are born for. We contemplate stars and oceans, we listen to the moving music and feel the connection with the rest of the world. But this intuition is unspoken. we feel and seek for that feeling. Finally it’s a chance to learn some philosophy trend or religious one. Because they might bring us closer to the transcendentality. Though this awfully strange word doesn’t explain much to us, we understand, that worldview we are seeking for is something we have to define… This is unbelievably difficult thing, because this means we have to turn our whole living and thinking up side down. We have to counter our inner demons, our inborn fears and illusions.

Well, where am I driving to? We want to change our lives for better. We want to be free, happy, creative, positive. We want to change it, but we have no idea what it can be. The schoolboy cannot imagine what life looks like when you are a student. But he knows, he should go step by step learning new subjects and new paradigm. Why do we suppose new better life is something less difficult? We have to become pupils and students and study the science of life. The concept of Dabrowski’s personal ideal on the fifth level – is concrete. It has to be realized, proved, spoken, learned and kept deep inside one’s heart. And this sounds to me like making a huge, deep and thorough personal research. The most inspiring question of this research would be – what is happiness to you? What is true happiness? Let’s think of it together next time.

A year-long month

@shodashi 2016

I took a month-break from all social, science and other duties. January is normally a drunk month in Carpatia – lazy holiday atmosphere, a feeling of comon well-being, Orthodox name-days celebrated by the whole country, several New Year Eves, Epiphany, and so on and so on. Besides this year I didn’t want it to be a Groundhug’s Day, so the holiday air was just a background for my activities. But how can I call the activity something that is done inside me? I can only point out some theses that caught my mind.

MENTAL HEALTH. What is the factor that breaks all our happy life theories? The fact of our death. You can like it or not, but we all die. At the end. But the other funny fact is that the end is sudden. Let’s imagine, you’ve been told you have only half a year left. Your actions? Go and entertain yourself as never before? Escape in some monastery? Rent a place on the Ganges bank? Finally start thinking of your vocation in life? Get depressed and angry with God? Or learning immediately what it means to die and what one should do to prepare oneself to this act? Continue reading

День независимости от себя


Так устала от себя – той, которая захватывает внимание, манипулирует, вызывает жалость, тоску, страх, которая делает вид, строит глазки, переживает – не оглянулся ли он чтобы посмотреть не оглянулась ли я. Как я устала доказывать другим, что я исключительная, что я лучше других умею хитрить, выколачивать нужное мне. Какая устала от лжи, которая стала моей сущностью. Как я устала от бессердечности и враждебности. Как я устала искать изъяны в других. Как я устала играть в эту примитивную игру инстинктов.

Мне так хочется быть искренней, перестать лгать себе и другим. Мне хочется просыпаться по утрам и принимать душ без угрызений совести. Мне хочется дружить с лучшими народами, сотрудничать и учиться у них тому, чего мне не хватает. Я хочу убраться в своем доме, а не считать посуду и тыкать в мусор в других домах. Я не хочу ябедничать другим, я хочу понять, что со мной не так, что я не могу справиться с ситуацией – ведь нет ничего нерешаемого. Я не хочу, чтобы меня жалели и давали подачки – ведь у меня есть и богатые земли и все возможные ресурсы для процветания. Я так хочу избавиться от предрассудков и начать жизнь с нового листа.

Я так хочу усмирить этого демона внутри себя, который отрицает все святое и терзает мою душу, искушая заведомо ложными ценностями. Я хочу радоваться простым открытиям, простым отношениям, хорошему в людях. Я не хочу добиваться уважения к себе, но хочу научиться уважать других – как друзей, так и врагов и быть достойным партнером в межгосударственных делах. Я не хочу подставлять ни друзей, не врагов ни в каких делах. Я не хочу быть фетишисткой, я не хочу, чтобы кусок ткани вызывал раж или ненависть. Я хочу, чтобы доброжелательность была высшим правосудием.

Я не хочу убегать от себя – ведь мои “таракашки” настигнут меня везде, куда бы я не скрылась. Я хочу стать независимой от себя такой, которая довела Ход Истории до ручки, которая с легкостью вызывает войну, которой безразлично горе и смерть невинных, которая не слышит ничего, кроме голоса своей похоти, жадности, страха, обид. Я хочу стать независимой ото всех своих ожиданий, а поэтому претензий ко всем вокруг. Хочу стать независимой от фантазирования о славном будущем и сонном бреде о прошлых заслугах.

Я хочу вместо хвалебных од себе любимой и уникальной, пустых слов и громких лозунгов действовать. Действовать молча, добросовестно, не для себя.